Hope Dies Last
by heartsmash
Summary: "But now, she just looks empty and he knows that he really can't do anything to help." P/R pregnancy future fic.


**Title: ****Hope Dies Last  
****Rating**: T, for Puck's mouth  
**Disclaimer**: Don't own, just taking the characters out for a spin.  
**Summary**: Inspired by Leah from 16 & Pregnant and how she and Corey had to leave her premature twins in the hospital. But this is a P/R spin on that with glimpses at the pregnancy. Anything in italics happened in the past. Happy ending, I swear!

Puck can't tell what she's thinking as she's carrying this small pot of gerbera daisies and a few balloons down the pathetically lit hallway of the hospital. Having been with her for so many years, he's kind of prided himself in learning everything about her (like when she wrinkles her nose at how he smells after he's played flag football with the guys or when she kinks her eyebrow in challenging his master plans). But now, she just looks empty and he knows that he really can't do anything to help.

He walks her around to the passenger seat of the truck and although he waits for her to berate him that she doesn't need his help, that she's perfectly capable of getting into a car by herself, the words never come. Puck quickly wonders if this whole experience has shocked her into silence and how long it will fucking last. Because honestly, he can count on his hands how many words she had said since yesterday and the world was a little bleaker without his girl chattering on about Tony Award winners or some random fact that he didn't know how she knew.

It's not until he's boosted himself into the driver's side and is about to put the car into reverse that she reacts. Rachel completely loses it and her shoulders shake with sobs. Gut-wrenching, hot searing poker on his skin, sobs.

"Rach…" he whispers and pulls her to him as best he can with the middle console in the way. She buries her head in his shoulder and he lets her cry, knowing full well that there's not much he can do for how she's feeling.

Puck was religious to an extent. He went to temple on the holy days but he didn't spend a lot of time pondering the existence of heaven or hell. But in that car with his wife crying hysterically, he quickly accepts the idea of hell on Earth.

Hell is sitting next to the one person that you love most and listening to her heart breaking into a million pieces. Hell is watching her entire body convulse with sobs because she's so tortured by what is going on.

Truthfully, he feels like shit as well but he wasn't in her shoes.

"Noah," she mumbles through fat tears that are still coursing their way down her cheeks, "I carried them for eight months and I should be taking them home. Instead they have to stay here in this … this place."

Their twin girls had arrived early and due to some developmental issues, they were being kept in the neonatal intensive unit for observation. The couple had stayed the four days since the birth but the social worker assigned to their case and Rachel's doctor had ordered them to go home. Both needed rest and Rachel needs to recuperate from the C-section that had brought Adelaide and Charlotte into this crazy fucked up world.

"What did I do wrong? I'm their mother and I let this happen to them," Rachel says, clutching at his t-shirt.

"Rachel," he says emphatically and firmly grabs her chin to get her to look at him, "You did everything perfectly."

And Puck seriously fucking meant it. When they found out she was pregnant, she had devoured every piece of literature that she could and did everything according to the book. Although a long time devotee to the vegan lifestyle, she had incorporated food items long since forgotten to nourish their unborn child, had banished the occasional glass of red wine and gone was the intense morning elliptical routine instead replaced with low impact exercise to maintain her health.

Finding out that they were pregnant with twins had knocked them both for a loop, but it had been a really good awesome fucking loop. As he held her shuddering form in his arms, willing her to calm down he was brought back to the very day that Dr. Booth had told them the good news.

"_Oh, cold," Rachel complained as her doctor squeezed some gel onto the small baby bump that she had developed in the first three months of her pregnancy. Puck gave her hand a gentle, reassuring squeeze and she shot him a smile before focusing on the monitor as Dr. Booth rolled the transducer across her stomach. _

_An uneven whirring sound filled the tiny room at once and Rachel immediately looked alarmed, tightening the grip on her husband's hand. _

"_What's wrong? The baby's heartbeat sounds so uneven."_

_The image finally came up on the ultrasound monitor and Dr. Booth could instantly see what issue Rachel had pointed out. Moving the transducer and tapping a few keys, the doctor grinned at the expectant couple. _

"_Nothing's wrong. But there they are," she said pointing to two separate sacs that were developing in Rachel's uterus. _

"_What the fuck? They?" Puck asked standing up to look at the monitor. Sure enough, there was a clear division between two babies. "Lady, seriously, I'm not questioning your medical degree but how the fuck did you miss this the first time around?" _

_Dr. Booth, who actually found Puck's personality charming instead of abrasive, told the couple that the one of the heartbeats had been tandem with its twin or with Rachel's during the first ultrasound, which could account for the lack of such vital information. Rachel had not really reacted since the news, just gaped at the monitor and touched the screen gently with her fingertips. _

"_But honestly, everything looks great. Rachel, why don't you get cleaned up and then we'll finish this consult in my office since this certainly changes a lot."_

_Dr. Booth left the room and Rachel wiped the gel off her stomach before buttoning her pants and fixing her shirt. _

"_Babe, I'm seriously hoping your stunned silence is good news because I'm fucking freaking out here."_

"_Come here," she said and he obliged allowing her to wrap her arms around him. "Yes, this changes things a little bit but we can do this." _

"_I'm just…I don't want to be him. And now I have two chances right away to screw it up." _

_Rachel automatically knew the him that he referred to. Eli Puckerman had run out on his family when Noah was just eight years old and Sarah was only a few weeks old. The resentment that Noah held for his father was palpable as he never referenced him as anything other than a sperm donor. _

"_Noah Puckerman, you're not going to be your father and do you know why? Because a long time ago, you chose to change who you were when you had the option to keep going down the current path."_

_He hung his head knowing exactly what path she referred to – throwing nerds into dumpsters, having sex with random girls and cougars, stealing an ATM and getting sent to juvie and giving the beautiful woman in front of him, the one that had chosen to be the mother to his children, a daily slushie facial. All shit that made his stomach turn in remembrance. Seeing him brood over her words, Rachel leaned up and placed a chaste kiss on the corner of his mouth. The action seemed to soothe his worries and his body relaxed._

"_We're gonna rock this shit huh?" he questioned, a mischievous grin now alighting his face. _

They had made it through 36 weeks, eight of which Rachel had been on bed rest. But then like a fucking freight train, there had been abdominal pain followed by bleeding and ending with immediate orders for a C-section and here they were. Adelaide was in a fucking incubator as she was having difficulty staying warm having weighed in at only five pounds. Charlotte was a little worse off, suffering through symptoms of RDS. He absolutely hated the tubes that were taped around her tiny nose, trying to help her breathe.

_It was telling her fathers and his mom that was the next hurdle. Rachel was superstitious and had wanted to wait until after the first trimester to divulge the information to anyone, and although Puck wanted to shout it from the rooftops, he was not about to cross his wife. _

_At first, the plan was to tell them separately but as the time grew closer for them to go home to Lima for Hanukah that year, Puck had gotten Rachel to say to hell with it and go with his plan. _

_See, he knew that his mom was going to lose her shit over the news. Aviva Puckerman had been praying for Jewish grandchildren to spoil since Puck had taken Rachel to their senior prom. And now that they were actually on the path to giving her exactly what she wanted, he wanted the reaction on video. _

_So he got Sarah on his side, slipping her a $20 to film some of their Hanukah celebration that year, saying he didn't want to do it and without telling her the news of Rachel's pregnancy. They spent solo time with both families before coming together to celebrate on the final night. _

"_Dad, Daddy, could you sit with Aviva? Noah and I actually got something for all three to use this year." _

_Rachel saw her Dad give her a confused glance and for a second, she thought that he was going to ruin the surprise. But when he took a seat, she knew that her choice of a loose black shirt and a cable knit cardigan on top had kept her secret safe. Puck picked up the expertly wrapped picture frame and handed it to his mom, who sat between Rachel's two fathers. He gave his sister the high sign and was happy to see that she was already recording. _

_The three tore into the present and saw the picture frame. _

"_Coming June 16, 2020," Rachel's daddy read aloud before his eyes snapped up to his daughter. _

_It took Aviva a minute to really make out the tiny blobs on the sonogram before her unholy shrieking began. Puck had known this was going to good and he was totally uploading this shit to YouTube. _

"_Oh my god!" Aviva screamed, bouncing on the couch at the news "Are you serious?"_

"_Yes, we wanted to wait to tell you about them until the end of the first trimester," Puck answered, cradling Rachel to him lovingly. He didn't know what it was, he absolutely loved Rachel with all his heart but since the knowledge of the pregnancy had fallen into their laps, he had found that if they were in the same room, he wanted to be touching her in some fashion. It wasn't exactly the biggest hardship he had to endure. _

"_THEM?" Sarah asked, her eyes nearly bugging out of her head. A chorus of the exact same thing that Sarah had caught on to started up and the four people who had just learned about Rachel's pregnancy demanded answers. Rachel and Puck gladly handed them over telling them all about how the first sonogram had not given them the news of twins and how they were dealing with the news as future parents. _

_The baby discussion was followed by an enormous amount of hugging, tears (his mother and a little bit from Rachel) and a ton of food (of which his mother had smacked his hand away with a rubber spatula from the potato latkes insisting Rachel go back for seconds first to nourish her grandchildren) before Rachel and Puck found themselves back at their hotel. Totally exhausted, they lay on the bed, fully dressed and tired eyes watching 'It's a Wonderful Life' as it played on one of the cable channels. _

"_What is it you want, Mary? What do you want? You want the moon? Just say the word and I'll throw a lasso around it and pull it down. Hey. That's a pretty good idea. I'll give you the moon, Mary." George Bailey said to his wife, Mary _

_Puck wasn't shocked when Rachel recited the next line. She had seen this movie enough times to know it word for word. _

"_I'll take it. Then what?" she said aloud and giggled when he kissed her cheek. _

_He splayed his hand on the pregnant swell of her stomach and rubbed gently. For her small frame, it was pronounced enough to truly make the idea of them having a baby (let alone two) a reality. _

"_I think everyone was very happy with the news tonight, don't you?" she questioned as she laced their fingers together over her baby bump._

"_Hell yeah babe, but I think we're going to have to reiterate to my mother that she is not allowed to move to Chicago because she thinks that the babies need her there," Puck answered, "That scary shit is enough to make them hide in there forever."_

_She laughed lightly at the comment that Aviva Puckerman had made at dinner seeing as how Sarah was going off to school next fall, there was nothing keeping her in Lima. Her husband had nearly blown a gasket at her thought process and only her gently rubbing his thigh had kept him from ruining the holiday._

"_I'm sleepy," Rachel said propping herself up on her forearms, "But I have no desire to change."_

_It was Puck's turn to laugh lightly. He got up from his spot and removed her boots and took the cardigan from her. The rest of her attire was comfortable enough for her to sleep in and he would not fight her on it. He stripped out of his own clothing and slid under the covers next to her, curling around her and dropping a kiss on her shoulder before they both fell asleep in the quiet hotel room. _

Rachel wrenched her chin away from his grip defiantly, not accepting his words.

"If I did everything perfectly, then why are they not coming home with us to the nursery that you painted and I decorated? Why are those two car seats empty?" she quietly asked, "I should have seen this coming. Raised by two fathers, how am I supposed to know how to be a good mother?"

"Rachel, shut up." He knew he risked getting his balls cut off at telling her to shut up but he just needed her to stop blaming herself for a hot second so that he could tell her that he felt exactly the same way. "Do you think I feel good about leaving them tonight? I don't. I feel fucking awful. As much as you're their mother, I'm their father. I'm supposed to be able to protect them from shit like this."

_Two girls. Shit, he's going to be outnumbered as soon as his daughters make their first appearance in the world. And although he had hoped for at least one male to even the playing field, he's good as long as they are happy and healthy. The latest 4D ultrasound had provided with them with a positive bill of health, a cleaner picture of their babies and the gender. _

_But now, they can paint the nursery and Rachel can nest because according to What to Expect When You're Expecting that shit is important. Plus, there's naming them which he figures is a good idea because if he calls them Thing 1 and Thing 2 anymore, he figures Rachel remove any chance of him having kids again. _

_So for a different Valentine's Day date, he gets a deep dish from Gino's, rents a few chick flicks and plans on lighting some candles when he gets home to his wife, they can sit down and start throwing around name ideas. _

_Puck isn't surprised to find her asleep on their bed, taking her regular afternoon nap. The pregnancy had been taking a lot out of her and she needed more sleep than normal. He let her sleep until things were set up and then he gently climbed on the bed and kissed her temple. _

_She climbed through the layers of sleep and looked at him drowsily. _

"_Hey," she said, her voice husky from sleep. _

"_Happy Valentine's Day babe," he said and instead of her being all excited that he actually remembered the holiday, her eyes quickly welled with tears and she began to cry. Wow, he was so totally not expecting that reaction. "What's wrong?" he asked, running a hand over her stomach to soothe her._

"_I'm a terrible wife, I forgot about Valentine's Day," she mumbles as big fat tears course over her cheeks. _

_He chuckles and her tears dry and she shoots him a glare. _

"_Babe, you're not a terrible wife. You've got baby brain and stuff like this happens," he explains, "But I did plan something for us if you would like to come into the den." _

_Appeased by his explanation, she takes his hand and he leads her into the den. He's got Roman Holiday cued up to play, the pizza box is in the oven keeping warm and the candlelight is just right. He's got three name books on the floor in a pile. The look on her face gives him indication of a job well done. With his help, she gets settled in the mountain of pillows that he laid out before takes a seat next to her. _

"_Happy Valentine's Day," Puck says again and leans over to give her a kiss. _

"_Happy Valentine's Day Noah," she says after the kiss before she complains that his daughters are starving. _

_Amidst pizza and the movie, they start throwing around baby names. They both have ones they absolutely positively hate and there are a few that they are considering. That's when Rachel comes up with a plan. _

"_I think we should each name one, but the other has to agree on the other name." _

_He's down especially since he still has veto power of her naming one of his kids Hestia or some shit. So she leans against his chest and flips through her book and makes a short list and he does the same. _

"_You go first," she urges and he gives her his first choice. _

"_I like the name Charlotte. It's kind of badass because The Cure has their song 'Charlotte Sometimes," Puck offers and her smile tells him Charlotte Puckerman will be making an appearance in June. _

_On Rachel's end, he negates Eva pulled straight from the Great White Way because his daughter is going to be associated with a film that Madonna starred in. _

"_What about Adelaide? From Guys and Dolls? She plays Frank Sinatra's fiancée in the movie." _

_He muses on it for a minute. It's a little bit old fashioned but then again Anberlin had a kick ass song by the same title. It seems fitting that both of their daughters are named after something music related. _

"_I like it," Puck consents and puts both of his hands on her expanding belly. He kisses her neck and she tilts her head back so she can give him a proper kiss. Somehow, he knows that they will tell their daughters about this night and how they got their names. _

Rachel honestly had not put much thought into how this was affecting her husband. True, she had carried the twins but he had been right alongside her, experiencing as much as he could like them kicking and singing to her stomach as lame as he claimed it was (and how Rachel would never tell him how happy he had looked doing it).

"Noah," she says softly and he gathers her in his arms again. They were both fighting a similar battle and they needed to be allies instead of at odds. "I'm sorry. You're right. We're going to get through this."

"Together," he whispers, his mouth level with her ear. Breaking from the embrace, he takes her hand and starts the car, steering with one hand. His right hand holding hers was a lifeline that he was not willing to let go of.

As they passed road signs to head back to their home that was a good twenty minutes away, Puck made an instantaneous decision that he hoped would heal the both of them, at least for the night. Cutting a U-turn and pulled into the parking lot of the Hampton Inn that was five minutes from the hospital and answered her questioning look.

"I figured you don't want to be far away from the girls and hell, neither do I," he answered matter-of-factly and put the irritating pot of gerbera daisies on the floor of the back seat.

The smile, despite being a bit sad, was the first one he had seen since the news yesterday. Puck would take what he could get. But he knew that them staying closer to the hospital was exactly what they both needed.

"Thank you," Rachel said as he helped her down out of the truck, knowing full well that her stitches and his truck's height didn't mesh. Her words though weren't just in reference to his assistance out of the car and it eased a bit of his worry for her.

_He hadn't heard from her in ten minutes. Being on bed rest, she demanded that she be able to go the bathroom in privacy. But that was going to fucking change because his gut told him that something was off. _

"_Babe?" he knocking gently before going into the bathroom. He found Rachel gripping the towel rack, eyes screwed shut and her breathing labored. "Babe," he said again and she finally looked at him. Her lips were white and it scared him. _

"_Something's wrong," she said grit out, "I'm bleeding and my back hurts."_

_Puck tried to think back to the baby books to the chapters on labor but the sight of Rachel in pain was making all that information fly out of his head. _

"_We gotta go to the hospital," he told her and took her hands into his. She gripped them tightly and he wished he could take some pain away. _

"_Grab the bag and call Dr. Booth," she instructed as they walked towards the front door and out to his car. He helped her up into the truck and she leaned her head against the cool glass. _

_He drove like hell to the hospital and didn't even care where he parked after he got a paramedic that was hanging outside the ER doors to take Rachel inside. Puck found her in a wheelchair and they said they were immediately taking her upstairs to Labor and Delivery where Dr. Booth would be meeting them shortly. _

"_Your wife is in labor. How far along is she?" the nurse asked as they got Rachel into a gown. _

"_36 weeks," he answered automatically and his stomach dropped knowing that the twins were not going to make it to full term. _

_A heart monitor was hooked up to both Rachel and a fetal monitor for their daughters. Puck watched as the heart rate on the girls declined. Dr. Booth seemed to appear out of nowhere and slid into a stool in front of the bed and got Rachel's feet into stirrups to do an exam. Puck did not like the look on her face. _

"_Rachel, you've had a placental abruption," Dr. Booth explains, "The placenta is peeling back from your uterus so we've got to get those babies out. We've got to do an emergency C-section." _

_People swarmed around Dr. Booth and three nurses dressed the doctor and another put a scrub cap on Rachel, who looked like a deer caught in headlights. The C-section had always hung over their heads as a possibility but Rachel had hoped to give birth naturally. _

"_It's going to be fine," Puck told Rachel, grabbing her hand giving it a squeeze, trying his best to rid her of worry. _

"_Noah, you need to get set if you're coming in." A nurse handed him scrubs of his own that he needed to change into. _

_Minutes later, the young couple was in a sterile operating room, a curtain being put up between Rachel's torso and her stomach. _

"_What's with the sheet?" Puck asked. _

"_Standard operating procedure," a nurse explained to him. Whatever the reason, it didn't make him feel any more comfortable with what was going on. He wanted Rachel to be okay and he wanted his daughters to be okay as well. But he knew that he had to play the strong one. _

"_Rachel, we don't have time to do the normal anesthetic for this so we're going to give you local injections and get moving okay?" _

"_O-okay," she stuttered out and Puck hated the scared look in her eyes. He sat on the stool next to her head and held her hand that did not have the IV in it, giving a quick kiss. _

_Her face twisted up in discomfort and he didn't know how else to help except for stroking cheek and quietly singing an old Beatles song to her._

_The nurse that was assisting the doctor with instruments took note and complimented him, "Your husband has a great voice Rachel, you think those babies are going to have his voice?" _

"_Naw, they're going to have her killer pipes." Rachel gave him a small smile at his words but the smile quickly retracted when Dr. Booth and another obstetrician began to make their incision. _

_Rachel couldn't describe the feeling of the procedure. She was numb for the most part but she could feel the tugging and the invasiveness. She honestly could not understand what people elected to do this rather than have a natural childbirth. _

_But it only took a few minutes before they heard the shrill cries of their first daughter filled the room. _

"_Shit she's loud babe," Puck said, "Most definitely the Broadway baby."_

_Nurses took Adelaide to get her cleaned off and weighed in and the doctors worked on getting Charlotte out. There was more discomfort as Charlotte was welcomed into the world but the lack of noise from the baby made Puck clench his jaw in worry. The other obstetrician, Dr. Thoms and two nurses were swarmed around Charlotte, working but nothing was said to the couple. _

"_Noah, what's wrong with her? Why isn't she crying?" Rachel asked, her voice thick with tears. _

_Puck knew that if she was not on the table, she would get up and see what was going on And honestly, he wanted to do the same thing. _

"_Dr. Booth?" Puck questioned and the kind green eyes that looked over the surgical mask flashed to his worried face. _

"_Charlotte is having some trouble breathing but the team is working on her and they will keep you updated on what's going on," the doctor answered, "Rachel, let's get your sewn up and into recovery." _

They got a room at the motel and Rachel fell asleep almost instantaneously. Puck knew that the experience had taken a lot more out of her than she had let on and in addition, the twice nightly vital checks hadn't allowed her much sleep in the hospital.

Taking his cell phone into the bathroom, he put down the lid on the toilet and took a seat before dialing his mom. Other than two quick phone calls to both sets of parents before going into the delivery room, they hadn't been given very much information and he knew that all three of them were most likely sitting on pins and needles with worry.

"Hello?" someone sleepily answered on the other end

"Mom?" Puck questioned, "I'm sorry you were asleep. I'll talk to you tomorrow"

"Noah Puckerman, you will do nothing of the sort! What's going on? How are Rachel and the babies?" Aviva Puckerman asked,

In the one simple question that his mother posed that caused Puck to almost lose control of his emotions. He hadn't cried in years but the situation he found himself in threatened that very action. It wasn't hard to recall how much he had loved Beth as a 16-year-old boy. Now, he was 27 with a wife and two critical infants and that feeling was multiplied by an infinite amount.

He told her about Adelaide being the incubator and the therapies they were giving Charlotte for the RDS. He told her how Rachel had absolutely fallen apart while leaving the hospital and how he had struggled to remain strong.

"Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. Those poor little girls," Mrs. Puckerman lamented, "And not to mention what you two are going through!"

"I'm trying to hold it together for her and just be there for her but a part of me wishes I just…fuck, I don't know. Make everything better? I feel so helpless."

"Honey, you're doing all that you can. You just need to love those little girls and doing what you've been doing for Rachel. She needs to find a heart that will love her at her worst and arms that will hold her at her weakest. She needs to continue to see that in you."

"Okay, thanks Mom."

Before he hung up with the woman that had single-handedly retained enough patience to raise him, they made plans for her to visit in two weeks and meet her granddaughters. Puck knew that for as much grief as the woman gave him, he was lucky to have her in his corner.

_Dr. Booth walked into Rachel's recovery room after the new parents had grabbed a short nap, the exhaustion of the day proving too much. _

"_Hi Mommy and Daddy," the doctor greeted, the chart in hand. _

"_Thank you," Rachel replied, holding onto Puck's hand tightly. Both wanted to know about their daughters and the "How are the babies?"_

_Dr. Booth pulled the rolling stool towards the bed and took a seat. Her kind green eyes spoke volumes – things weren't great but they weren't decidedly bleak either. _

_"Your daughters were born four weeks early. Premature babies have not developed completely. The earlier a baby is born, the less developed its organs are. Premature babies tend to have very specific problems."_

_"What kind of problems, Doc?" Puck anxiously asked._

_"Let me start by saying that things could have been a lot worse. Both are fairly healthy. Adelaide was a little low on birth weight so we're keeping her in an incubator to held regulate her body temperature which she can't do on her own yet. And Charlotte is having some trouble breathing because of something called respiratory distress syndrome. Right now she is being helped with oxygen and some medication."_

_"Is she going to be okay?" Rachel asked horrified._

_Dr. Booth took a deep breath._

_"Charlotte's condition could certainly been a lot worse but we're monitoring the condition around the clock. Because she was 36 weeks, I don't suspect it to get worse but we're not going to take any chances."_

_"Can I see them?" Rachel asked tearfully._

_"Of course", she complied softly._

_An orderly came with a wheelchair for Rachel before the new parents were ushered to the NICU where both Adelaide and Charlotte were being monitored. They put on surgical scrubs and masks before entering the room as to protect their girls and the other babies from germs and infections._

_They approached the large machines that housed their tiny daughters and Rachel gasped. Her knees buckled but Puck was there behind her like a rock, her pillar of strength pushing her slowly forward. The thing she was most thankful for was that the two incubators that their daughters grew in were stationed next to her. Internally, Rachel liked to believe that they were looking out for each other. The new parents peered inside and saw their small daughters. _

_"They're so tiny", Rachel whispered in awe._

_"They're beautiful", Puck corrected._

_"I know. They are beautiful."_

Rachel felt extremely sore when she woke up in the hotel room. She found her husband still asleep next to her and she took a minute to admire him as he rested, the stress lines nonexistent and long dark lashes fanning his face.

She remembers waking up this way the day after they had conceived the twins (trust her, she did the math to be sure). Only the previous time, her soreness was not from major surgery and instead from too much wine at one of his work functions which had yielded an insatiable need for him. Multiple times.

Rachel woke up with a major headache the next morning, as wine hangovers were their own form of torture. But she had a few minutes to watch the man next to her sleep, memorizing the angle of his jaw and how his lips curved into a gentle smile as he slept. That was until he caught her staring.

"Quit your staring woman and let me sleep," he mumbled, his eyes still closed.

Exactly like now.

"How did you know?" she asks guiltily as well as shocked

"You think I need my eyes open to know exactly what's going on with you?" His hazel eyes slowly opened and he stifled a yawn. Puck didn't wait for an answer from her because he knew that Rachel knew the answer. "We should get to the hospital soon."

"_You've got to be fucking kidding me."_

"_Noah," Rachel said, her saying his name as a mixture of reprimand and sadness. She did not like this news any more than he was. The only thing was that he was most certainly verbalizing it. _

_It was four days after the emergency C-section and the couple had been pulled away from the NICU to meet with a social worker. Linda was middle aged and looked as if she was analyzing every single word that passed your lips. _

"_No…you're telling me that we need to leave the hospital without my kids? You've got to be fucked up in the head or something to think that makes any kind of sense." Puck felt like a caged animal but he sat next to his wife, knowing if he got up he would probably punch the wall or kick the linens container over. "Do you even have any idea what we're going through? What you're asking of us?"_

_The social worker looked at the two of them patiently. _

"_I have never been in your shoes, no." Puck muttered something under his breath but Linda continued, "But I am trained to make this situation as easy as possible."_

"_All right, you come up with that solution. Go ahead, I'll wait," the new father replied sarcastically. _

"_Mr. Puckerman, you must be dealing with so much right now but think about the big picture. Your wife has had major surgery and as such, needs to recover. The best place for her to do that is not in a hospital but in her own home. Your children need the attention and care of our hospital staff for several more days before they can be released."_

_Puck's irritated expression melted as the social worker explained everything._

"_When you say it like that, I guess…"_

"_Trust me, we want those two little girls with their parents as soon as possible. Adelaide needs to gain another 5 ounces for her to be released and if Charlotte's nasal flaring and breathing continue to normalize, she'll be out of here as well."_

It took another week and them nearly moving into the Hampton Inn before the Puckermans got some good news. That Tuesday, Adelaide finally reached the six ounces that she needed to gain bringing her weight to a still small 6 pounds. And Charlotte's breathing finally normalized enough so that she was out of the woods. The babies could finally go home.

Although they hoped and prayed for the moment to come, both were nervous to take them from the safety of the hospital. But the nursing staff was confident in their skills and sent them on their way with detailed care instructions.

Rachel took care in dressing each of them in pale yellow and lilac layette outfits and getting them into their car seats. Puck watched in awe as the mothering aspect just came to her naturally because he knew that the girl had not so much held a baby before becoming pregnant herself.

"Babe," he said watching her finish the snap on Charlotte's car seat.

Rachel turned to look at him and she could see the anxiety painted on his face.

"Noah, don't be nervous." Her words did not appear to do any good in making her husband feeling any calmer. Checking on the babies, she walked to where he stood and grabbed his hands.

"We're going to rock this shit," Rachel said, repeating his words from nearly seven months ago.

Her confidence in the two of them allowed him to nod and give her a quick kiss.

"Yeah, we got this," he agreed and moved to grab one of the carseats.

They would get through it together just as they had done since they were eighteen.


End file.
